A Wandering Eye – Single Girl’s Guide to Flirting

My last article suggesting you leave the BFFs at home and travel solo has generated so many emails, comments, etc.  It may surprise you, however, that the item which yielded the most feedback was about meeting nice guys while flying solo.  I am sad there are so many sisters out there who can’t seem to meet anyone while traveling but the fact of the matter is that you have to be open and available and know how to turn on the flirt vibes or it is not going to happen.

My BFF and I swear we are going to write a book someday because women today just don’t know how to flirt and it is an art.  She’s the blond and I’m No. 4N chestnut.  She’s giddy and I’m cerebral.  She’s the Thelma to my Louise but each time we venture out, each and every time, there isn’t one time when one of us is not approached by a friendly guy.

So, I’m about to share some wisdom with you girls who dare to fly solo but always wind up alone.  So, put down that pint of double chocolate chip and listen up.  Here are some tips for flirting on the road but which should be modified and incorporated into your daily routine:

1.  Be available – physically and emotionally.  Now, by physically, I am not saying you need to bed every man you meet but I mean you need to physically be where men congregate. You are not going to meet men locked in your hotel room or sitting in the back of the bus while touring with a group of old ladies.  Screw that. Get out. Go sit at a bar. Chat up the bartender and ask where you can go to dance or bowl or whatever you like to do.

As to being available emotionally – don’t analyze every damn thing that happens in your life.  In the comments I received on Reasons to Leave the BFF at Home, there were so many women who wrote about bonding and meditating and being one with nature.  Screw that crap and just live.  Not everything is meant to be scrutinized and men  all over the world HATE THAT.  Did you hear me – loud and clear – MEN HATE SCRUTINY so stop it or you will be alone.

2. Dress for success. Re-think the crocs and khaki cargos unless you’re traveling alone on safari and you’re the only female for miles who walks on two legs.  Think about the animal kingdom, the men are always prettier, whether they are peacocks or fish.  The men display color and the women are grey.  That’s because we have to try harder, ladies.  Die your hair, buy some make-up and get busy.  Those closest to you will rarely tell you that you look like crap so take it from me, if you’re not meeting men then go get a makeover.  Now, I can guarantee that I will get a lot of agita on this point because there will be many women, the ones who really need the makeover, who will write to me and say that there is more than just looks to a relationship.  OK, those women will still be wondering why they can’t meet anyone on vacation when they finish writing to me.  Bottom line is that in order to be picked out from across a crowded hotel, you need to stand out from the crowd.

Photo: Graur Crodin/freedigitalphotos.net

3.  Be interesting. Develop a sense of humor with this newfound sense of style.  Laugh at their stupid jokes.  They are trying so hard to overcome their insecurities to speak with you and you are sitting there like a Roman ruin.  Instead, be a goddess.  You can be statuesque without being a statue.  Practice your conversation skills with the hotel clerk, man or woman.  If you can’t start a conversation with a stranger for 5 minutes then how do you expect to meet anyone on vacation?

4.  Be mysterious. Don’t blab on about why you are traveling alone to get away from your life because it’s so boring……….zzzzzzzzzzzz, I’m sleeping as I write that.  Who cares?  What was the last book you read; movie you saw, great meal you had?  Discover an obscure fact during your daytrip and use it to start a conversation with someone that evening.  Learn about your new friend.  Ask them what’s their fantasy trip?  Just the use of the word “fantasy” is going to get most men thinking.  That’s what I mean, double entendre, giggles, leave them hanging – it’s a game ladies.  It’s a game till the day they die and you need to learn how to play it to keep them as interested in you as they are in baseball, soccer, or fly-fishing.

5.  Stop looking for fairytale endings. Not every relationship, encounter, friendship with a man needs to end in “happily ever after.”  I know women who basically shut the guy down before getting to dessert on the first date.  Why? Because he’s not sending out “forever vibes.”  Stop writing the end first or you will never get to “once upon a time.”

Some Bad Boys are oh, so good!

I can’t believe I have now blabbed on for nearly 900 words about relationships on a travel site.  Yet, this relationship stuff should be so easy and women make it so complicated.  If you want to laugh, and learn something in the meantime……travel over to visit my friend Steve Santagati.  Sometimes he’s full of hot air and I’ll tell him so but he gives lots of great advice and is worth a listen…..and oh so yummy to look at! (No, he didn’t pay me to say that either!)

Buona fortuna, ragazzi and let me know how you make out.